Hindi Shayari

मेरी गली से वो जब भी गुजरता होगा
मोड़ पे जाके कुछ देर ठहरता होगा
भूल जाना मुझको इतना आसान तो न होगा
दिल मैं कुछटूट के तो बिखरता होगा
साथ देखे थे जो उन ख्वाबों का कारवा
गुबा बनकर उसकी आँखों में उभरता होगा
कोई जब चूमता होगा उसे बांहों में लेकर
मेरा प्यार बदन में उसके सिहरता होगा
उसकी जुल्फों को मेरी उँगलियाँ दुलारती होंगी
सामने आईने के वो जब भी संवारता होगा
दर्द जब भी देता होगा ये संगदिल ज़माना
वो बेवफा इस “मन” को याद करता होगा

From: vicky (cool_v21@yahoo.com)

Janu meri blouse utaro...

Janu meri blouse utaro

Wife to her husband: janu meri blouse utaro..

AB aisa karo mera ghaghra bhi utaro.

Aur khabardar Jo aaj k baad mere kapde pehne to :p

~~~~~~~~~

Old Man-"putar ander se mere daant Le AA"

Pota-"par dada ji abhi roti to bani nahi"

Budda-- "o nahi putar roti nahi khani samne wali buddi nu smile deni a "

~~~~~~~~~

Child: Mom is bar hum sare patakhe is shop se lein gey,

Mom : lekin beta ye to girls hostel hai,

Child: Papa to kahte hain k sari phul-jhadiyan yahi rahti hain.

~~~~~~~~~
Ek ladke ko kya chahiye?

Ek ladki Jo pyar de,
Ek ladki Jo acha khana banaye,
Ek ladki Jo us ki khob khidmat kare,

Aur ye teeno larkiyan mil jul kar rahain. :p

Boring Hindi Jokes Read Again

Boy said to Girl- Aa mere dil me aaja
Girl replied- Chappal utaroo kya?
Boy- Chal pagli ye koi mandir thode hi h aise hi aaja
************ ********* ****
Girl- hamari shaadi ko 24 ghante ho chuke h
boy- aur aisa lag raha h jaise kal ki hi baat ho
************ ********* ****
BRAIN TUMOR:

Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.

Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)

Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?

Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?

Doctor: Then why are you so happy?

Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
************ ********* ****
MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:

Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?

Mr. Bean: 9

Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?

Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!
************ ********* ****

WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:

Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.

Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?

Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
************ ********* ****

AT AN ATM MACHINE:

Friend: What are you looking at?

Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.

Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?

Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!
************ ********* ****
Marriage:

Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?

Mr. Bean: 16

Friend: Why?

Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse.
************ ********* ****

CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:

Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?

Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture.

Friend: What tape did you took anyway?
Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.
************ ********* ****

DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:
Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom's dead.

Friend: condolence, my friend.

(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder

Friend: what now?

Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!
************ ********* ****

MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:

Colleague: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.

Mr. Bean: That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.
************ ********* ****

Spelling lesson:

Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful.. ..is it one c or two c?

Mr. Bean: Make it three c to be sure!
************ ********* ****

teacher:what do you call person who cannot hear anything

studant:you can call him any thing,because he cannot hear anything.
************ ********* ****
mil gaya,oye hoye mil gaya, balle balle mil gaya, dhinchak dhincak koi mil gaya, apna sara kaam chhos kar fizool ka SMS parnewaala ek aur BEWAKUFF!! mil gaya.
************ ********* ****


why women live a better, longer & peacefull life?

because women dont have a wife...
************ ********* ****

church ke gate par likha tha:jo paap kar k thak gaye wo meri sharan me aaye,

ek callgirl ne niche apna mibile no. likh diya:aur jo nahi thake wo meri sharan me aaye..
************ ********* ****


ladkiya kadko k saamne aane k baad hi kyu apna dupatta thik karti hai

kyunki, lutero ko dekhne k baad hi apni dolat ki hifazat ka khayal aata hai..
************ ********* ****

ek gujju ka sapne me kisi ne rape kar diya

next day us ne apna bank account band karva diya

kuonki, bank me likha tha: ham aap k sapno ko haqiqat me badal denge..
************ ********* ****

baap: beta mene tumhare liye ek ladki dhundhi hai

wo roopvati, gunvati aur sarasvati hai..

beta:lekin me kisi aur ladki se pyaar karta hu

aur wo GARBHVATI hai..
************ ********* ****
Old Man-"putar ander se mere daant le aa"

Pota-"par dada ji abhi roti to bani nahi"

Budda-- "o nahi putar roti nahi khani samne wali buddi nu smile deni a "
************ ********* ****
Child: Mom is bar hum sare patakhe is shop se lein gey,

Mom : lekin beta ye to girls hostel hai,

Child: Papa to kahte hain k sari phul-jhadiyan yahi rahti hain.
************ ********* ****
Ek ladke ko kya chahiye?

Ek ladki jo pyar de,
Ek ladki jo acha khana banaye,
Ek ladki jo us ki khob khidmat kare,

Aur ye teeno larkiyan mil jul kar rahain. :p
************ ********* ****

Husband apni wife ka janaza le jaa raha tha.
Janaze k aage ek kutta aur peche aadmiyon ki lambi line thi,

Ek aadmi aakar pochta hai : bhai sahab ye sab kaise hua?
Husband : is kutte ne kaat liya tha.

Aadmi : ye kutta ek din k liye udhar main de do.
Husband : peche line main lago. :p
************ ********* ****
TAKE A LOOK:

Tech Support : "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer : "Ok."
Tech Support : "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until
this point?"
Customer : "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
************ ********* ****
Customer : "I received the software update you sent, but I am still
getting the same error message."
Tech Support : "Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"
************ ********* ****
Customer : "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
Tech Support : "Tell me what you've done."
Customer : "I typed 'A: SETUP'."
Tech Support : "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer : "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support : "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer : "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."
************ ********* ****
Customer : "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support : ?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)
************ ********* ****
Tech Support : "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,
can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer : "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
Tech support : ??????
************ ********* ****
Tech Support : "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer : "A white one."
Tech support : ?????
************ ********* ****
Tech Support : "What operating system are you running?"
Customer : "Pentium."
Tech support : ??????
************ ********* ****
Cus tomer : "I have Microsoft Exploder."
Tech Support : ??????
************ ********* ****
Customer : "How do I print my voicemail?"
Tech support : ??????
************ ********* ****
Customer : "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to
print document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support : "What does it say?"
Customer : "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support : "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer : "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."
Tech support : ?????
************ ********* ****

Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open
24 hours."
Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"
************ ********* ****
Tech Support : "What does the screen say now?"
Customer : "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support : "Well?"
Customer : "How do I know when it's ready?"
Tech support : ??????
************ ********* ****
The best of the lot
A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that
his computer is faulty.
Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: (keep quite)
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup
and it will fix the
problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
Tech support::
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech
is frustrated and fed up.
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there
is an undocumented DOS
command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech : Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE . COM at
the end of the CONFIG.SYS. Let me know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User : It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech : Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User : MS-DOS 6.22 .
Tech : That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with
NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you
the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User : I need a new power supply.
Tech support : How did you come to that conclusion?
User : Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he
started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.

************ ********* ****

Hight Of all (Too Good)

customer care officer: I need a product identification number
right now and may I help u in
finding it out?
Customer: sure
CCO: could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
Cust: I did left click but how do I find your computer?
************ ********* ****

Love Life & Indian Advertisement Line

Want
to propose a girl
Just do it - Nike

************ *

Before going to propose to a girl
Believe in the best - BPL.

************ *


If you are hesitating before proposing to a girl
Vicks ki goli lo kich kich door karo -

************ *

If you are going to propose to a girl
Chances are 50-50 - Britannia.

************ *

If a girl slapped you when you proposed to her
Take it easy - Limca.

************ *

Girl says NO !
Jor ka jhatka dhire se lage - Mirinda.

************ *

Those who succeed in love always say
We dream because we do - Daewoo.

************ *

If some one wants to write a love letter to his girlfriend
Likho script apna apna.- Rotomac.

************ *

If you love someone
Go get it - Visa power.

************ *

Boy riding a bike with neighbor's girl
Neighbors envy owner's pride - Onida.

************ *

Not satisfied with your date
Yeh dil mangey more - Pepsi.

************ *

A guy having a number of girl friends
The Complete Man - Raymonds.

************ *

A smart girl having a number of boyfriends
Yeh hai hamara suraksha chakra - Colgate.

************ *

For those lost in love
Har shaam ka sathi main aur mera - Bagpiper Whisky.

************ *

For a guy 'r gal who hasn't yet found one
Dhoondte rehe jayo GE - Surf Excel

Yahoo Ki Wo Mulakatein

Yahoo Ki Wo Mulakatein
Wo Pyar Bhari Batein
Wo Loging Hony Ka Intzaar
Wo Intzaar Ki Saaetein
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Wo Farzi Naam Ka Btana
Haha Likh Ker Jhoota Qehqaha Lagana
Wo Asl Poochny Par
Apni Umar Ko Aor Kam Btana
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Wo Pyar Bhari Tehreerien
Wo Yahoo Ki Emotion Tasweerein
Wo Nick Mein Haal-E-Dil Likhna
Wo Net Ko Fast Karny Ki Tadbeerien
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Wo Typing Se Unglion Mein Dard Hona
Kisi Baat Per Gusay Se Chehry Ka Zard Hona

Lafz Sorry Ka Screen Par Atay Hi
Lehjay Ka Phir Se Sard Hona
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Wo Jaagna Roz Raton Mein
Wo Chalakna Pyar Baton Mein
Wo Type Karty Karty
Lena Mouse Hathon Mein
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Wo Yahoo Pe Doosron Ko Ignore Karna
Har Jumley Par Bohat Ghor Karna

Wo Dil Per Hath Rakh Kar Bye Kehna
Aor Zara Der Aor Rukny Per Zor Karna
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Tumhary Login Hotay Hi
Dostoon Ka Wo Jhumgutha Lag Jana
Tum Se Bat Karny Ki Khatir
Sir Dard Ka Wo Jhoota Bahana
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Bewaja Ki Batoon Per Takraar Karna
Baar Baar Net Meeting Per Israar Karna
Wo Roman Urdu Mein Ki Gayi Batein
Pyar Ka Dabay Lafzon Mein Izhar Karna
Kaho Kya Bhool Jao Ge?
Wo Doston Se Tumhara Id Chupana
Kabhi Font Badalna Kabhi Gungunanaa
Der Se Jawab Anay Per
Busy Hony Ka Ilzam Lagana
Per Lagta Hai Tum Bhool Gaye��
Yahoo K Aanchal Per Likhi Hoyi Kahani
Per Mujh Ko Yad Hai Har Ik Lafz Zubani
Khudara Na Tum Aisa Sitam Karo

Hindi Shayari

Jab chandani barh kar, raaton pey chaati hai
Teri yaad aise mai, dil ko tarpaati hai
kisse wo bahaaron ke, beete nazaaron key
Phir aake sunaati hai, aur hum ko rulaati hai
Teri yaad aati haiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Itna to bataho kya? yahi chaandani jaa kar
koi khaab jagaati hai?, tum ko bhi sataati hai?
Meri yaad aati hai????

Shayari

Kaash tum nagme hame sunaye na hote,
Aaj unko sun kar aansu aye na hote.
Agar isi tarah bhool hi jaana tha,
To itni gehrai se dil me samaye na hote

Larkiyaan Bewafaa nahi hoti

Wo to majborioon main lipti hain
Apney shiddat bharey khyaloon main
Apney ander chhupi ek aurat main
Wo hamesha hi darti rehti hain
Na to jeeti hain na to marti hain
Larkiyaan bewafaa nahi hoti Per Hamesha hi darti rehti hain
Apne reeti or rawajoon se
Any waley naye azaboon se
Zardurat main khily ghulaboon se
Pyaar kerti hain or chhupati hain
Larkiyaan Bewafaa nahi hot
Kyuon ki majborioon main lepti hain
Or her lamha darti rehti hain Apney pyaar se apney saye se
Apney rishton se dil ki dharkan se
Apni khowahish se apni kushioon se
Larkiyaan Bewafaa nahi hoti !!!

Yaar jo bhi mila dil jala kar gaya...

Yaar jo bhi mila dil jala kar gaya
Khaak main meri hasthi mila kar gaya

Pyaas jiski sada mai bhujatha raha
Zahere-katil mujhe wo pila kar gaya

Naaz uski wafa per mujhe tha magar
Teer woh bhi jigar per chala kar gaya

Doondta tha kabhi jo mujhe her gali
Aankh wo aaj mujhse bacha kar gaya

Mangta tha sahara jo herdam mujhe
Besahara mujhe wo bana kar gaya

Neend aagosh main jiski aane lagi
Maut ki neend mujh ko sula kar gaya

Aarzoo thi "Yaaro" kisii ki mujhe,
Kwaab mere wahi to mita kar gaya

Soya tha raat koo, par nend nahi aayee...

Soya tha raat koo, par nend nahi aayee,

Saari raat humko sirf unki hee yaad satayee,

Aankh khuli toh paya apney aap ko bilkul akela,

Fir yaad aaya, tujhe rehna hai ……., aur abhi akela..

Hindi SMS

Abe khajur,
Zoo se bhage hue langur,
Abe Sade hue kele ke chilke,
Chuse hue am,
Circus ke retired Bandar,
Aisa kisi ko na kehna,
Feel hota hai!

Vo reshmi baalo vali,
Bhuri aankho vali,
Komal hatho or naram pero vali,
Matakti hui andhere me,
Tumhare pass aayegi aur dhire se,
Bolegi.., "Miyaaau"…

Idhar khuda hai udar khuda hain
Jidhar dekho udar khuda hai
Kabhe telecom ke name par khuda hain
Kabe municipal ke name se khuda hain

Jahan Dosti hain Wahan Pyaar hain,
Jahan Pyaar hain Waha Ishq hai,
Jahan Ishq hain Wahan Mohabbat,
Jahan Mohabbat hain Wahan Judaai,
Jahan Judaai wahan Dard,
Jahan Dard wahan ZANDU Balm!

Kya pyaar mein aisa hota hai?

Kya pyaar mein aisa hota hai?

Ke jisse dil chahe uss pe mar jaane ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ke aansoo pi jaane ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ke her ghum ko mitta dene ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ko her pal muskurrata hua dekhne ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss par zindagani lutta dene ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ka haath pakar kar urra le jaane ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ki aankhon mein kho jaane ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ki pyaari pyaari baaton ko her pal sun ne ko dil chahta ha?
Ke uss ko her khushi dene ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ko her aafat se mehfooz rakhne ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ke raaste mein gire hue her kaante ko utha dene ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ko dil mein chupaa lene ko dil chahta hai?
Ke uss ko her pal sapnon mein rakhne ko dil chahta hai?
Kya pyaar mein aisa hota hai?
Ke uss ki parchaayee ko hi dekh kar dil khush ho jata hai?
Ke uss ki ek nazar se hi dil ko sukoon aajata hai?
Ke uss ka chehra chaaron taraf chha jaata hai?
Ke uss ki baat baat par pyaar aajata hai?
Ke uss ki baahon mein dil mar jaana chahta hai?
Ke uss ke haathon ki lakeeron ko dil badal dena chahta hai?
Ke uss ke naseeb mein likha hua her ghum dil apne naam kar lena chahta hai?
Ke uss ki her khawaish ko dil pura kar dena chahta hai?
Ke saare jahan ki khushiyan dil uss ke kadmon mein bicha dena chahta hai?
Kya pyaar mein aisa hota hai?
Ke uss ke saath jeena to kya uss ke )saath mar jaane ko dil chahta hai?
Kya pyaar mein aisa hota hai.?

Hindi SMS Shayari

Tujhe bhoolkar bhi na bhool payenge hum,
Bas yahi ek wada nibha payenge hum.
Mita denge khud ko bhi jahan se lekin,
Tera naam dil se na mita payenge hum..

Is kadar hum yaar ko manane nikle,
Uski chahat ke hum deewane nikle,
Jab bhi use dil ka haal batana chaha,
To uske hothon se waqt na hone ke bahane nikle

Ummido ki shama dil me mat jalana,
is jahan se alag duniya mat basana,
aaj bas mood me tha to SMS kar diya,
par roj intezar me palke mat bichana!

Dil si cheez hai, dene ko hai de dengay
Magar koi tumsa qabeel bhi to ho,
Hum to jaan de kay bhi khush hongay
Magar koi tumsa qateel bhi to ho.

Unka Waada Hai...

Unka Waada Hai Ki Vo Laut Aayenge ,
Esi Umeed Pe Hum Jiye Jayengey ,
Ye Intjaar Bhi Unhi Ki Tarah He ,
Kar Rahe They , Kar Rahe He Aur Kiye Jayenge...

Khawab Dekhey Bhi Nahi Aur Toot Gaye ,
Hum Unse Miley Bhi Nahi Aur Vo Rooth Gaye ,
Hum Jagtey Rahe Duniya Soti Rahi ,
Ek Barish Hi Thi Jo Sang Hamare Roti Rahi......

Aashiq Ankhon Hi Ankhon Me Baat Samaj Lete He ,
Sapno Me Milne Ko Mulakat Samaz Lete He ,
Rota He Ashma Bhi Jami Ke Liye ,
Pagal He Log Usse Barsaat Samaj Lete He......

Is dil ka kaha maano ek kaam kar do,
Ek be-naam si mohabbat mere naam kar do,
Merey par faqat itna ehsan kar do,
Ek subha ko milo aur shaam kar do.